Degrees, Drama, and Daycare: Confidence Is Not Competence

Viral debates about who “counts” as an expert can feel like entertainment, until you realize early childhood education lives with the consequences. I start with the online credibility mess and pull it back to the question directors, teachers, and families face every day: who do we trust, and why. Confidence sells, but children deserve competence, evidence, and leaders who refuse to outsource their judgment.

From there, I dig into Indiana’s proposed childcare licensing changes and the bigger workforce crisis underneath them. When staffing is tight, do we invest in a career pipeline or quietly lower expectations and call it “access”? We talk professionalization in ECE, what qualifications are actually for, and the practical supports that keep people in the field: mentoring, onboarding, coaching, scholarships, paid training, better wages, and realistic career growth that does not automatically mean becoming the director.

Then we switch gears into consent, context, and privacy. A photo release is not a blank check, and “but it’s cute” is not an ethical standard. I break down what informed consent should look like for child photos, staff images, testimonials, and marketing, plus why AI tools raise new privacy risks for observations, incident reports, and family communication.

If you lead a program, work in a classroom, or simply care about how childcare operates, this one will sharpen your radar. Subscribe, share with a colleague, and leave a review so more educators can find the show.

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Transcript

Welcome To The Work Stumble

SPEAKER_00 0:06

Welcome to Stumbling Through Work where Educators Figure Shit Out. I'm your host, Dr. Jared Cuff, and this is the place where we try to make sense of the good, confusing, and completely unnecessary one workday at a time. Let's get into it.

Confidence Versus Credibility Online

SPEAKER_00 0:25

Hey team, welcome to another episode of Stumbling Through Work where Educators Figure Shit Out. Now, today we're talking about one of the biggest internet debates over the last few weeks. If you've been on social media, it has been a whole hot mess. And you have probably seen it. Now, I'm not saying anyone's name because I'm not giving them a shout out, but people have been debating everything from her credentials, the use of the title doctor, to her professional licensing and whether she's qualified to do her job. Now, before anybody starts with me, this episode is not about deciding whether this person is right or wrong. I, you know, I am not here to litigate someone else's career. I don't even know this lady, and we are not in the same circle. See, I'm in the stumbling through work circle with y'all, but well, you know what? Maybe she is one of our teammates, maybe she is a part of our team. I don't know. But if she is, hey girl, we're talking about you. But the internet already has appointed itself judge, jury, and executioner. What interests me is something much bigger. Because underneath all of this drama is a question that hits every single one of us in education within early childhood education overall. Who do we trust? Who gets to call themselves an expert? Why do we automatically believe certain people? And why do we sometimes ignore the people who actually knows what they're actually talking about? I mean, let's be honest. ECE has been dealing with this exact problem for years. We just don't usually have millions of people arguing about it online. Because the internet loves confidence more than competence. Let me say that again. The internet loves confidence more than competence. Here's something I've learned. People confuse confidence with credibility. If someone speaks loud enough with enough conviction, they're wearing a blazer, they use words like trauma inform, throws around psychological buzzwords, they have a ring light, a podcast, three microphones, and dramatic background music, people immediately assume they must know what they're talking about. Meanwhile, the actual expert is like quietly sitting in a corner reading peer-reviewed research that nobody bothered to click because it wasn't accompanied by inspirational piano music. This happens in childcare every single day. Nobody, you know, somebody posts, you know, a 30-second reel. Here's five things every preschool teacher is doing wrong, and it gets like two million views. Then teachers start to panic, directors start changing classroom practices, parents suddenly become experts after watching one video during their lunch break, and nobody asks, is any of this actually supported by research? Instead, we ask, how many followers do they have? Apparently, follower account has become the newest accreditation agency. So, like, you know, forget NAC, licensing, developmental science. If you have enough followers, congratulations. You are now apparently qualified to redesign early childhood education. And that is terrifying because children deserve better than viral advice. And now Brenda enters the chat. And let's introduce her today, as we always do. Because you know, Brenda watched, you know, exactly one TikTok video where the creator said, Timeout damages children forever. Brenda immediately calls an emergency staff meeting. We're eliminating consequences. Well, what are we replacing them with? Positive vibes. Now, Brenda. Positive vibes did not stop Malik from biting three kids before snack. Sometimes children need guidance, sometimes they need limits, sometimes they need adults who actually understand child development instead of recycling social media quotes. And credentials do matter, but they're not magic. Here's where I think the internet misses this point. People keep arguing about whether credentials matter. Yes, they matter, but they're not magic. A degree does not automatically make someone wise. A title doesn't automatically make someone ethical. A license doesn't guarantee good judgment. But you know, here's what they do tell us. They tell us someone has completed a recognized course of study. They've been evaluated, they have met certain standards. That's valuable. And should we still ask questions? Absolutely. Healthy skepticism is part of being a professional, but skepticism should apply to everyone, not just the people we disagree with. Here's where I think ECE gets itself in trouble. Sometimes we come we know we completely dismiss education. I don't need college. I've been doing this for 25 years. Okay, experience does matter a lot, actually. But let's not pretend experience automatically means excellence. We're not going to sit here and do that. I have seen people repeat the same mistake twenty for 25 years. That is not experience. That's commitment, and there's a difference. But on the flip side, I have met directors with master degrees who could not organize dismal without, you know, creating a traffic jam that looked like Black Friday at Costco. Education without leadership isn't enough either. The best leaders combine combine them. You know, that's knowledge, experience, reflection, humility. And notice I use the word humility. Because the minute someone believes they know everything, that's usually when learning stops. As a director, imagine interviewing someone. What qualifies you to lead this center? I have 12 million TikTok views. Anything else? My motivational reel change lives. Can you explain licensing ratios? What's a ratio? Thank you, ma'am, for coming in. We'll call you if we decide to close the building permanently. Let's let's talk about something uncomfortable. This profession loves charismatic people. You know, conference speakers must, you know, they must be brilliant and have large Instagram followings and, you know, obviously an expert clearly beyond questioning. Slow down. Being entertaining and being accurate are not the same thing. Some of the smartest people I've ever met in education are not influencers. They're classroom teachers, they're coaches, they're researchers, they're experienced directors. People quietly solve problems every single day, but they're not flashy so they don't go viral. And see, parents do this too. Parents walk into a center quoting influencers. I saw a parenting coach say children should choose their own bedtime. Fantastic. Your child is four. Yesterday he wanted hot sauce and tahheen on his pancakes. Here's what the controversy should remind every educator. Don't worship personalities, evaluate ideas, ask questions, look at evidence, read beyond headlines, understand context. Being a leader doesn't mean having all the answers. It means asking better questions. If someone says this strategy works, ask, you know, compare to what? According to whom? What research supports it? Can I implement it safely? Does it meet licensing requirements? Will it actually benefit children? Notice what's missing. Follower count, because popularity is not peer reviewed. Virality is not validation. Confidence is not competence. And the loudest voice in the room isn't automatically the wisest. Let's imagine Brenda again. She attends a leadership conference. The keynote speaker tells everyone, forget policies, just lead with your heart. Brenda comes back inspired, y'all, throws away half the employee handbook, licensing arrives two weeks later, and the surveyor asks, Where is your medication log? Brenda smiles warmly and says, We're leading with our hearts. And then the surveyor writes, I'm leading with this citation. Turns out feelings don't replace documentation. Who knew? Here's what I hope you take away from today's conversation. Whether it's this lady I don't know, an influencer, a childcare consultant, a motivational speaker, or even me. Don't stop thinking, don't outsource your judgment. Listen, learn, ask questions, read research, you know, value education, respect experience. Challenge ideas, including your own, because our profession deserves leaders who are curious enough to keep learning and humble enough to admit when they don't know something.

Indiana Looks To Lower Qualifications

SPEAKER_00 9:35

Children don't need internet personalities, but placing that aside, in Indiana, somebody looked at the child care workforce crisis and said, We can't find enough qualified people. And instead of saying, maybe we should improve compensation, maybe we should invest in education, maybe we should figure out why teachers keep leaving. Maybe we should create, you know, an actual career pipeline. Somebody apparently asks, but what if we just change the qualifications? And that is certainly one way to solve a problem, Indiana. If I can't afford a Maybach, I don't suddenly just redefine a 1999 Nissan Central as a luxury vehicle. But welcome to childcare. Indiana has been considering a major rewrite of regulations governing licensing childcare programs. The purpose change has generated significant pushback from providers. The argument from the state is essentially that reducing administrative burdens and unnecessary expenses could help childcare businesses grow and expand access. Now I'm going to read that one more time before we really dive into that. The argument from the state is essentially that reducing administrative burdens and unnecessary expensive could help child care businesses grow and expand access. And I understand the problem that they're trying to solve. Childcare is expensive. Programs are struggling, directors can't find teachers, families can't find spaces, teachers are leaving, programs are closing, and everyone is stressed. But here's where I have questions because when an industry can't recruit enough qualified professionals, there are two very different responses. Response A, how do we make the profession attractive enough that qualified people want to enter and stay? Response B How qualified do they really need to be? Those are not the same workforce strategies. Let's acknowledge reality. ECE, early childhood education, has a workforce problem. And directors know exactly what I'm talking about. You post a job, three people apply, one doesn't answer, you know, one schedules the interview and disappears into another dimension, and Brenda arrives 23 minutes late holding a Starbucks cup saying, Sorry, traffic, Brenda, you live four minutes away. Then you finally hire somebody. You spend weeks training them, you introduce them to the families, the children learn their names, you finally have enough people that the director can sit in their office for 17 consecutive minutes, and then you get the text. Hey, I don't think this is for me. Of course. Why would it be? You're asking someone to, you know, supervise 10 tiny humans who haven't fully developed emotional regulations while communicating with families, documenting, you know, development, implementing curriculum, cleaning, sanitizing, managing behaviors, and maintaining licensing compliance. And we're shocked when they decide Target looks peaceful. So yes, we need workers, but the question isn't simply how do we get more bodies into the classroom. The question is how do we build and retain a competent ECE workforce? Those are very different questions. Here's where ECE continuously has an identity crisis. We say early childhood educators are professionals. Great! Then treat them like professionals. Professionalization isn't just calling someone a teacher, it means education, training, competency, coaching, professional development, compensation, career, you know, advancement, standards. You cannot demand professional outcome while treating professional preparation as optional. Because early childhood educators aren't simply making sure everybody survives into pickup. They're supporting language development, social emotional development, cognitive development, physical development, um, executive functioning, early literacy, early mathematics, conflict resolution, uh self-regulation, and the list goes on. They're often among the first professionals outside the family to notice developmental concerns. Really think about that. And see that requires knowledge. And before somebody says, I've worked with children for 25 years and I don't have a degree, great, because like I said before, experience does matter. There are phenomenal educators who entered ECE without degrees and then built you know substantial expertise throughout the years of practice, credentials, training, and professional development. That isn't the issue. I'm not saying something as simple as degree equals good teacher, no degree equals bad teacher. Like, let's do better than that. The real question is what combination of education, competency, training, experience, and ongoing development should we expect from someone's response for children's early learning? Indiana's existing center rules illustrate how seriously education has historically been treated at the leadership level. For example, current director qualification pathways include degrees in you know early childhood or elementary education, other bachelor's degrees paired with ECE coursework or CDA, or you know, an associate's degree in ECE combined with experience. That's not arbitrary paperwork, it's an attempt to establish a baseline. If programs cannot recruit qualified educators, we should ask why. What are we paying them? Do they receive benefits? Can we can they afford child care for their own children? Is there paid planning time? Do they receive meaningful professional development? Can they advance without becoming a director? Do they have supportive leadership? Are classrooms adequately staffed? Are programs creating workforce conditions that you know make people want to stay? Because if the answer to the workforce shortage becomes lowering qualifications without addressing those questions, we haven't solved the shortage. We just changed the definition of success. Imagine an airline saying, We're experiencing a pilot shortage, and somebody walks into the board meeting and says, I have an idea. Like, what? What's the idea? Less pilots. Come on now, really. More than likely, they would investigate, you know, why pilots aren't entering or staying in the profession. And ECE needs that same conversation. Now let's talk about who gets stuck managing all of this. The director. Because apparently the director's job is HR, licensing, enrollment, marketing, family relations, curriculum, payroll facilities, uh, food service, teacher coaching, conflict mediation, occasionally unclogging the preschool toilet because you know some child has flushed half the dramatic place centered down it. Then staffing requirements change after all of that. Guess who has to interpret them? The director. Who is now recruiting according to them? The director. Who is now training people? The director. Who is explaining everything to families? The director. Who is maintaining quality? Take a guess. The director. This is why ECE workforce policies cannot be separate from leadership. If we're going to create alternative pathways into ECE, and there can be good reason to do that, then programs need stronger onboarding, supervision, mentoring, and professional development, not less. You cannot lower the barrier to entry and simultaneously weaken the development system after people enter. Now here's the argument we hear constantly. If requirements are too high, programs can't find workers. Okay. Then if programs can't find workers, classrooms can't open. Correct. Then if classrooms can't open, families don't have access to care. Also correct. But then somehow we arrive at therefore reduce requirements. Hold on. There are several missing pages in that strategic plan. What about scholarships for ECE credentials, paid apprenticeship, you know, employer-sponsored CDA programs, college, you know, partnerships, tuition assistance, paid training, mentorship, career ladders, you know, retention bonuses, better wages, benefits. I can just keep going. If we want more ECE professionals, build a pipeline. Let someone enter as an assistant teacher, give them structured training, pair them with a mentor, help them earn a CDA, then maybe an associate's degree, then a bachelor's degree, if that's their goal. Give them increasingly increasing responsibility. Now increase their compensation as their competency increases. So I'm gonna make sure I say that part. You know, give them leadership opportunities that don't automatically mean congratulations, you're now the director. Here's 84 email, three call-outs, and a licensing visit all before 10 a.m. That's workforce development. We should make it possible for people to enter the field without pretending that professional development stops at their first day. The Indiana debate is bigger than Indiana. What it's asking is what makes someone an early childhood professional? Is it education, experience, competency, credentials, training, some combination of all of them? And once we decide, are we willing to fund the system required to help people reach that standard? Hmm. And on that note, we'll be right back. Let's

Book Break The Program Leader

SPEAKER_00 19:51

just be honest, leading a program or center sounds cute until the staff calls out, the goals make no sense, the policies are doing backflips, and somehow everybody is looking at you for answers. That's why I wrote The Program Leader: How to Lead, Set Goals, and Achieve Lasting Results in Your Program. This book is for directors, supervisors, coordinators, and leaders who are trying to build structure without losing their minds. We talk leadership, goal setting, systems, staff development, and how to lead with intentions, even when work is getting on your nerves. You can get your copy at abbreviatedlearning.com or just continue to do what you're doing, making no progress. Welcome back.

Permission Is Not A Blank Check

SPEAKER_00 20:44

Katie Perry. Yes, Katie Perry. I'm about to take you on a journey from firework to photo releases at Little Sunshine Academy, just stay with me. So here's the situation. Katie Perry publicly objected after her song Firework was used in a White House social media video depicting U.S. military strikes. Now we're not getting into the politics of, you know, military action today. That's that's another podcast. Wrong podcast. But what interests me is the larger issue underneath the controversy. A song can have a meaning associated with it. An artist can have an intention behind it, and then somebody else can take that exact same material, put it into a completely different context, and suddenly it communicates something the creator never intended. And that brings us directly into early childhood education because childcare centers collect an incredible amount of materials from children, family, and employees photos, videos, artwork, testimonials, family stories, staff biographies, observations, recordings, you know. And so, with all of that, here's today's question When somebody gives us permission. To use something, how far does that permission actually go? Because you know in ECE, we love a form. We have forms for everything: enrollment form, emergency contact form, medication form, sunscreen form, field trip form, photo release, authorization form, acknowledgement that you received the handbook, acknowledgement that you acknowledge that you received the handbook. At some point, I'm expecting a form, you know, confirming that you received the form confirming receipt of the other form. But we have to stop treating signatures as replacement for judgment. Let's talk about the classic ECE example, the photo release. Now, you know, a mom enrolls her four-year-old son Braden. She gets 37 pieces of paperwork. She's trying to remember whether grandma is authorized for pickup, whether Braden is allergic to strawberries, what time lunch starts, where she parked, and why tuition costs are you know approximately the same as financing a small yacht. Then she sees permission to photograph child and she checks, yes, done. And apparently that means Braden has signed with a major talent agency. Because three months later, Braden is everywhere. He's on Facebook, he's on Instagram, he's on the website, he's on the enrollment brochure, the summer camp flyer, he's on the Google Business profile. There's a six-foot banner outside the building. Braden is standing there holding blocks with the words enroll today. Braden can't even read y'all. Braden don't even know tuition. Braden has never toured the infant room. But apparently, Braden is now vice president of marketing, and technically someone might say, But mom signed the photo release. Okay. But what did mom actually understand what she was agreeing to? Was she agreeing to classroom pictures? Private parent communication? A closed family application? Public social media, paid advertisement, a billboard? Those aren't necessarily the same thing. Consent should be informed and specific enough that people understand what they're agreeing to. This is where leadership matters because access and consent are two different things. You can have access to a picture, that doesn't automatically mean you should post it. You might have access to family story, to a family story, that doesn't automatically mean it belongs on your marketing campaign. You may have access to a staff member's image. That doesn't automatically mean they're comfortable becoming the face of your recruitment advertisement. Now imagine Brenda works in the toddler room. Brenda loves her job. Brenda Brenda participates in Pajama Day. Somebody takes a picture of Brenda wearing unicorn pajamas while holding a puppet. Cute picture. Two months later, Brenda opened Instagram. Bam! There she is. Now hiring. Join our team. Brenda didn't even know y'all were hiring. And now she's apparently recruiting on behalf of the company dressed like a unicorn. That's where leaders have to ask more. Can we? Maybe you should ask, should we? And did this person understand how this would be used? Those are different questions. And here's where this gets more serious. Young children don't control most of their digital footprint. Adults do. We decide what to get, you know, we decide what gets photographed, we decide what gets posted, we decide what's public, we decide what story accompanies the image. And that means every early childhood program has a significant responsibility because we are talking about children. Children aren't marketing props, they aren't enrollment advertisement, children aren't content, they're children. That doesn't mean programs can't never share photos. Families often enjoy seeing classroom experiences and programs legitimately wanting to showcase what children are learning. And there should be a thoughtful process behind that. Who can see it? Who you know who are we posting it to? What information accompanies it? What does the family authorize? Does the image reveal anything unnecessarily personal? And here's the one that doesn't get discussed enough. Would we be comfortable with that image remaining online years from now? Because the internet has a memory of an elephant with Wi-Fi, y'all. ECE also has this fascinating ethical standard called, but it's cute. Apparently, once something is adorable, all other considerations disappear. Child falls asleep at lunch, take a picture. Child has yogurt, you know, covering their entire face, take a picture. Child shows up wearing something hilarious, take a picture. Child is having an emotional moment. Somebody has their phone out before the child has even finished crying. And sometimes those moments belong to the child and their family, not the center's social media strategy. We have to distinguish between a cute moment we witnessed and a moment we have the right to broadcast. Those aren't automatically the same thing. And employees deserve, you know, consideration too. ECE marketing has become extremely visual. We want smiling teachers, happy classrooms, directors greeting families, staff doing activities, everybody's laughing while holding paintbrushes. And apparently nobody in childcare has ever completed paperwork because, according to our marketing photos, everybody spends eight hours sitting on the carpet smiling. But staff members should understand how their images are being used. There's a difference between we're taking pictures at staff appreciation week and we're putting your face in a paid recruitment campaign that says love your job again, especially if Brenda is currently updating her resume during nap time. But I digress because why? Context matters. This applies to you know words as well. Imagine a parent email. Thank you so much for helping Maya transition into preschool. Miss Jasmine has been wonderful. You know, that's beautiful. It's great feedback. You share it with Miss Jasmine, you celebrate it with the team, but don't automatically turn around and post five stars. Best preschool ever. My daughter loves it. Maya's mom. Now hold the hell on. Maya's mom did not write that. She wrote an email thanking a teacher. Those are different things. If you want to use somebody's feedback publicly, ask, would you be comfortable with us sharing this testimonial and tell them where? You know, it's gonna be on the website, social media, printed marketing. Because consent becomes much more meaningful when people understand the context. And because apparently privacy wasn't complicated enough, welcome to 2026, and now we have AI. Programs need to think seriously about what information employees put into an AI system. Child observations, behavior descriptions, family communication, incident reports, photos, staffing information. You cannot simply copy everything you know about a child until whatever AI tool you found Tuesday afternoon because you wanted to rewrite your parent conference notes. Technology changes, yes, it does. And your responsibility to protect children and families information does not. Before using you know an AI tool, as a leader, you need to understand what information is being entered, where it goes, how it's being stored, and what organizational policies apply. You know, saying you know, Chat GPT made it sound professional is not a privacy policy. So, what should ECE leaders do? First, review your consent forms. Look at your photo and media releases. Does the language actually explain how images may be used? Consider separating different types of use when appropriate. Um, internal classroom communication is different from public social media. Public social media is different from paid advertisement. Secondly, train your staff. Don't assume everybody understands privacy because they sign the handbook. Talk about what staff can photograph, what they can post, what devices they can use, where the children's names should appear, how many how families' information should be handled, and what happens when a parent says no. Thirdly, make no easy. A family should not feel like refusing public photography somehow makes them the difficult parent. They shouldn't have to explain themselves. No, I don't want my child on social media. Okay, done. You don't need a TED talk about it. And fourth, check before repurposing content. A photo originally taken for one purpose doesn't necessarily need to become marketing content later. So this week Katy Perry gave us an unexpected ECE leadership lesson. Permission isn't a blank check. A signature isn't unlimited consent, and access doesn't equal ownership. So, moving along, it is time for asking for a friend.

Getting Hired With Your Kids Enrolled

SPEAKER_00 31:27

I've been trying to get a job as a teacher assistant for the last four months. I have years of experience in childcare. I have a genuine passion for working with kids, but I have two little kids, almost a f almost a four-year-old and a one-year-old. I would love to find a job where I can enroll my kids and get a tuition discount. All of the interviews always go great, but when I mention bringing my kids, it always turns into a bunch of mmm and hmm. How to actually secure a job at daycare if you want to bring your kids too. I generally thought I was going to go to my first interview and bam, you're hired. But man, this was a humble. Any advice? So we're about to have this conversation. So let's just talk about it. Here's the first thing I want you to understand. Those mmm and hmm, they are they are not about your qualifications, lady. The director may genuinely just like you, but the second you mention two children, and not just two children, two children attending the program, they are no longer interviewing just one person. See, in their minds, they are trying to figure out can they hire you? Um, can they enroll your four-year-old? Can they enroll your one-year-old? Do they have space? In what classroom? What discount? What happens with staffing? And most importantly, what happens when your children cannot come to school? Because this is one of the biggest concerns nobody is going to tell you during the interview. Let's just be honest. You have a one-year-old and an almost four-year-old, they're going to get sick, lady. They are going to get sick. And not because there's anything wrong with your children. I'm not saying that because I'm just saying they're just children. Children are adorable little disease distributors, especially once they enter group care. Somebody walks into the toddler room with one cough on Monday, and by Thursday, half the building sounds like a tuberculosis ward. So management is thinking, what happens when this one-year-old gets a fever? Because if the center says your child has to go home, guess who is probably also going home? You. And now the center doesn't just lose a child for the day, they lost a staff member. And child care staffing does not have a lot of wiggle room. One teacher calls out, and suddenly the director is moving people around the building like pieces on a chessboard. Okay, move Sarah to toddlers, but Sarah's open in preschool, put Michelle in preschool. Michelle called out, and where's Brenda? Nobody's seen Brenda since Tuesday. Fantastic. We're doing great. And sickness isn't the only thing. The child has a doctor appointment. You may need to miss work, didn't dentist appointment, you may need to leave early, preschool conference, you need time off. Your one-year-old wakes up vomiting at 5 30 in the morning. Guess who's probably isn't clocking in at seven? This is what the director may be calculating. But they're not just thinking, you know, she has two kids. They're thinking, if either one of those kids cannot attend, do I lose my employee too? Now, is that fair? Not always, because plenty of parents have backup child care. Plenty of parents have spouses, you know, grandparents, family members, other arrangements, and employees without children call out too. Now, you know, you know, let's not act like childless employees are you know standing outside at the center at 6 30 every morning waiting to clock in. Some of them are texting, you know, hey, I don't think I'm gonna make it in today. And the director is like, Are you sick? No, my energy just feels weird. Ma'am, we have ratios. Bring your weird ass energy to work. But, you know, from a management perspective, this is still a legitimate, a legitimate concern. Because if your child care and your employment are tied to the same building, one problem can affect both. So I would actually address that during the interview. I will say something like, I understand that having my child enrolled here can raise concerns about attendance if they're sick or have appointments. I have a plan for backup care and would manage appointments proactively rather, you know, whenever possible. Now that sounds different because you're showing the director you've already thought about it. The second problem is they may not have space for your children. This is especially true for your one-year-old. Infant and toddler spaces are precious. A center can have six open, you know, six job openings and not have one available toddler spot. Childcare is ridiculous that way. The center is posting urgently hiring teachers, but then you ask, do you have room for my one-year-old? And suddenly our next opening is approximately when your child graduates from college. Because classroom capacity is classroom capacity. They may genuinely want to hire you, but you know, they may not have room for your children. And if your ability to work depends on both children attending, they know hiring you may not be realistic. Now let's talk about the money. Because eventually everything comes back to money. You have two children, and you're specifically looking for employee tuition benefits, which makes sense, but management may be doing calculations. If employee tuition is significantly discounted, they're thinking about two enrollment spots that could potentially be occupied by full paying families. And now somebody from corporate has appeared with a spreadsheet. Nothing destroys a beautiful childcare moment faster than Excel. You are thinking, you need a teacher, and I need child care. Corporate is thinking, okay, but what is the revenue impact per square foot? Also, directors have seen some things. Somebody before you probably ruined this. An employee's child attended the center, and every time the child cried, mom appeared. Every time the child got redirected, mom wanted a meeting. Every time another child touched their child, whose child is that? Now the director has trauma. So you walk into an interview perfectly normal and say, My children would attend to. And the director immediately remembers Ashley from 2019. Ashley was in the classroom 11 times a day checking on little Caden. Now everybody with children is suspicious. That's how childcare policies happen. One person does something crazy, and 20 years later, it's still on page 47 of the employee handbook. Stop treating your children's enrollment like something you mentioned at the very end. You don't need to open the interview with it now. You don't need to be like, hello, I'm Jennifer. Here's my children. No, I'm not saying that. Well, once you know there's mutual interest, just ask, what is your employee childcare benefit? And do you currently have availability for a one-year-old and a four-year-old? See, that was a direct question because you need to know. There is no point completing three more interviews, orientation, fingerprints, background checks, CPR, tuberculosis training, and testing, you know, references, signing your life away just for somebody to say, Oh, by the way, our toddler room is full. Now, you didn't get humbled. You just discovered how childcare actually operates, and there's a difference. Because on paper, this should be simple. Child care centers need teachers, parents need child care, childcare workers are often parents. Therefore, offering affordable childcare to employees should help recruit and retain childcare workers. Beautiful, logical, reasonable, so natural, we've made it complicated. So keep applying, just keep applying. You know, look specifically for employers that offer advertisement child care discounts, ask about enrollment availability sooner, make your experience sound as strong as it actually is. Because parents can be excellent employees, parents can be excellent teachers, and childcare programs desperately need experienced people. Okay guys, here is our next question, and y'all this one took me out.

When Diarrhea Means Stay Home

SPEAKER_00 39:42

Okay, this is kind of a weird one, but when do you consider your own diarrhea to be too much to bring to work? Guidelines for the kids where I work is that on the second liquid diaper of the day, parents are called and the kid stays home to 24 hours of normal poops. I think I caught some bug and have had the squirt since Thursday. But I'm kind of embarrassed to call in sick over this as I am still fully functioning. Also, I'm still in the probationary period and Monday is my birthday, so I'm definitely not calling in on Monday. But generally, what are your own guidelines? Cho let me just say this. If we are sending a two-year-old home for diarrhea, why are you standing in the classroom clinching? That is my first question. Because somehow childcare has created this interesting disease hierarchy. Children have two loose stools, call mom immediately. Teacher has gone to the bathroom six times since opening. Can you stay until close? Excuse me? So little Madison's diarrhea is a public health emergency, but Miss Ashley is teaching circle time with her knees locked together? Apparently not. And yes, adults are different from toddlers. You are toilet trained, hopefully. You can wash your hands, hopefully. You are not having diarrhea directly into a diaper that another adult has to change, hopefully. So no, the exact child exclusion rule does not automatically translate to employees. But diarrhea can be infectious, and childcare is an efficient environment for spreading gastrointern illnesses. Because staff are toilet training children, changing diapers, handling shared surfaces, and helping with meals. Now the CDC childcare guideline says children and adults with diarrhea should be excluded until symptoms are gone. This is how we end up saying, well, Brenda only vomited twice, so put her in preschool. No. The question is, am I potentially contagious and can I safely perform my job without exposing everyone else? Let's just say you decide I'm going in, I feel okay. Beautiful. You have eight toddlers, you are in ratio by yourself, then your stomach makes that noise, and you know that noise. That little internal your immediate you your entire personality changes immediately. You like you stop teaching, you stop singing, you stop caring about developmental milestones. Your only developmental goal is to make it to that bathroom, and you cannot just announce, okay, children, Miss Jasmine needs seven to twelve minutes alone. Make responsible choices. That is not gonna work. You work in childcare, you need coverage. So now you are standing at the classroom door whispering, can somebody cover me? And honestly, once your diarrhea is interfering with your ability to remain in the classroom and supervise consistently, I don't care how functional you feel, you are not functional for this job today. And I understand why you're nervous. I mean, I get it, you're new. You don't want to look unreliable, you don't want, you know, management thinking she's already calling out, especially when Monday is her birthday, because now you're worried, you know, what they're going to think. Oh, diarrhea on your birthday weekend? Sure, how convenient. For something like neurovirus, though, people can remain highly contagious around the period of active symptoms. The American Academy of Pediatric notes that children are less likely to spread neurovirus once vomiting and diarrhea have been gone for at least 48 hours. Maybe it's a virus that you have. Maybe it's something you ate. Maybe your stomach simply is rejecting your life choices. I don't know. But diarrhea lasting since Thursday is enough for me to say stop making decisions based solely on embarrassment. Check your workplace illness policy and contact a healthcare professional if it persists. That is my advice to you. And if you think you have an infectious stomach bug, please stay home. The children do not need a birthday party favor from your intestine. And on that note, we'll be right back. Let's talk about training and professional development. And no, not the kind where everybody sits in a room, pretends to be engaged, eats the snacks, signs the sheep, and leaves doing the same thing they were doing before. That's not the go. Through Abbreviated Learning, we provide practical training and professional development for early childhood programs, schools, and organizations that need strategies people can actually use when the meeting is over. So if your team needs more than another cute handout, book your next training with us at abbreviatedlearning.com where we know how to make the work make sense. We

Courtesy Counts In Everyday Leadership

SPEAKER_00 44:49

are back with leadership advice, and today's advice is courteous counts. Yes, courtesy, not strategic planning, not organizational development, not emotional intelligence assessment, not a 14-page leadership retreat workbook, something just simple. I'm talking about saying please, thank you, you're welcome, excuse me, I'm sorry. It's like groundbreaking, right? Because somehow people get promoted into leadership and immediately develop a mysterious allergy to basic manners. Suddenly, can you please handle this? Becomes need this done. No greeting, no name, no please, no punctuation, just a message that looks like it was sent during a hostage negotiation. And then leaders wonder why the staff morale survey comes back looking like a crime scene. Courteous counts. Courteous matters because leadership is built in the small interactions people have with you every single day. People may forget your strategic plan. They may forget what you said during the quarterly meeting. They may definitely forget the PowerPoint presentation with 47 slides that could have been sent in an email. But people remember how you made them feel when they asked you a question. They remember whether you acknowledged them when they walked into the room. They remember whether you said thank you after they stayed late. They remember whether you apologized when you were wrong. And yes, leaders are sometimes wrong. Leadership does not remove your ability to make mistakes, it just gives your mistakes a bigger audience. So let's break it down just a little bit. Being courteous at work. Say please. Please is a very small word that completely changes the way a request sounds. There's a difference between send me that report and can you please send me that report? Same expectations, same report, same deadline. And one sounds like I work with you while the other sounds like you recently purchased me. And managers love to say, Well, I shouldn't have to say please, it's their job. Correct. And theoretically, you shouldn't have to hold the door for somebody either, but you do it because you were hopefully raised somewhere other than in a cave. Courtesy does not weaken authority. You don't lose relationship, you don't lose leadership position because you said please. Nobody hears please and says, Oh wow, apparently Deborah is no longer the director. You can be direct and respectful at the same time. Say thank you. This one is important. Please stop acting like employees receive a paycheck, meaning that, you know, they never deserve appreciation. Every time somebody says, Why should I thank them? They're getting paid. What I want to ask is, so are you? And somehow you still want recognition? Interesting. Hmm. People can be compensated for their job and appreciated for their efforts simultaneously. Thank you for staying late. Thank you for covering that classroom. Thank you for helping with that family. Thank you for catching that mistake. Thank you for handling that difficult conversation. Thank you for doing what needed to be done. And no, appreciate appreciation does not always need to involve pizza. ECE has traumatized enough people with appreciation pizza. You'll be working short staffed, exhausted, underpaid, and emotionally hanging on by a thread, and leadership walks in like good news, we got little Caesars. Oh, wonderful. Nothing says we value you like a six dollar cheese pizza split between nine people. Sometimes just sincerely saying thank you goes a long way. Say you're welcome. And when somebody says thank you, acknowledge it. You're welcome. No problem. Absolutely. Of course. Say something because some of y'all respond to thank yous with silence, just staring at people. Say something. Communication should not feel like employees are interacting with a non-playable characters whose dialogue options have expired. Say excuse me. That's another one. Here's another revolutionary concept. When you interrupt somebody, say excuse me. When you walk between two people talking, say excuse me. When you bump into somebody, say excuse me. When you enter a classroom and immediately start talking over the teacher, say excuse me. Actually, let's let's stay there for a minute. Because leaders, especially in ECE, sometimes walk into classrooms like federal agents, you know, executing a search warrant. Teacher is reading a story, children are engaged, everybody is calm, and the director comes storming in. Jessica, did you turn in your training certificate? Ma'am, the very hungry caterpillar was in the middle of eating through Tuesday. Can this wait? Courtesy means recognizing that your urgency does not automatically become everyone else's urgency problem. Emergency on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine. I have said that many a times to people, they probably sick of me saying it because it's true. Also, say I'm sorry. Now let's get uncomfortable for a second. Leaders need to apologize. Not I'm sorry you feel that way. That's not an apology. That is corporate gaslighting wearing business casual. Try, I'm sorry I handled that poorly, or I'm sorry I should have communicated that sor communicated that sooner. You know, I'm sorry, I misunderstood that situation. I'm sorry I was wrong. I know that last one kind of hurts for some of y'all because some leaders would rather resign than say I was wrong. Let me tell y'all, there are people that will create committees, conduct investigations, they would develop new policies, they will call regional leadership, they will schedule a mandatory meeting all because they did not want to say, My bad. You know, accountability builds credibility. And when a leader admits a mistake, good employees usually do not think less of them. Actually, what they think is okay, at least this person is honest, and that creates psychological safety because now the team knows mistakes can be addressed instead of buried under their ego. Use things like sir or ma'am carefully. You know, courtesy can include respectful titles like sir and ma'am, you know, depending on the culture, setting, preference, the individual. But see, here's the important part respect is not just forcing everybody into a personal definition of politeness. So respect means learning how people prefer to be addressed. For some people, sir or ma'am, you know, it feels respectful. For others, it may not, and that's fine. Leadership requires enough awareness to understand that courtesy is about the person receiving it, not just your not just your intentions. Because nothing says respect like yelling, I was raised to call everybody ma'am. Okay, but Brenda has asked six times not to call her ma'am. At this point, you're not being courteous, you're just you're just conducting a campaign just to get on everybody's nerves. Also, use people's names. Use somebody's names when you know it. People notice. Like, good morning, Jasmine. Thank you, Marcus. Hey, Danielle, can I ask you something? Names create connection, especially if you manage large teams. One of the fastest ways to make employees feel invisible is to work with them for six months and still say, Hey, you. Imagine working somewhere for a year and your boss is pointing at you during a staff meeting like you in the cardigan. Uh, my name is Patricia. Uh, I even have direct deposit here. Leaders should make an effort with pronunciation too. I want to be very clear about that. If you can memorize the Wi-Fi password, DoorDash order, licensing code, alarm code, you know, printer password, every word to a Beyonce song, you can make an effort to pronounce somebody's name correctly. Behave in a courteous manner as well. That's the last thing I'm gonna say because courtesy is bigger than words. It's behavior. It's how you respond when you're stressed, it's how you treat the custodian, it's how you treat the receptionist, how you treat substitutes, how you treat the new employee who still doesn't know where anything is, how you treat the parent who asked the same question three times, and yes, I get it, it's irritating. It's how you treat staff when corporate leadership is not watching, because anybody can perform professionalism when the regional director walks in, suddenly everybody is like, Good morning, how may I assist you? We believe strongly in staff wellness. Meanwhile, yesterday you told Brenda just to figure it out. Real leadership shows up when there's no audience. Courtesy is consistency, and s and also one more thing, say it with a smile. Now, do you need to walk around smiling every second of your work day like you're in a toothpaste commercial? No. That would just be terrifying. But tone matters, facial expression matters, body language matters. You can say the correct words with the wrong energy. Thank you. But your face says, I hope both sides of your pillow are warm tonight. You get no rest. You know, people pick up on that. Leadership communication is not just words coming out of your mouth, it's the full experience. It's your tone, your posture, your timing, your facial expression, your response. Sometimes leaders need to check themselves before approaching staff because maybe you just got yelled at at corporate, maybe enrollment is down, somebody called out, maybe licensing walked in, maybe the copier has decided today is the day it wants to die, and Brenda just microwave fish in the break room. Again, you're allowed to be irritated, but you are still responsible for how you treat people. Courteous is not weak leadership. Some managers refuse kindness with weakness. They think leadership has to sound harsh. They think being intimidating creates respect. It doesn't. It usually creates employees who stop telling you things. They stop asking questions, they stop admitting mistakes, they stop giving honest feedback, and eventually they stop caring. Courtesy does not mean avoiding accountability. You can say, please make sure this is complete before you leave today. You can say thank you for explaining what happened. We still need to address the issue. You can say, I'm sorry the conversation is difficult, but the expectation remains the same. Professional courtesy and clear boundaries can exist together. Cause see, courtesy costs almost nothing. Please, thank you, you're welcome, excuse me, I'm sorry. You know, watching your tone, acknowledging people, and occasionally smile like you don't regret, you know, choosing leadership as a career. Because leadership is not just about, you know, getting people to complete tasks, it's about creating an environment where people feel respected while completing those tasks. And somehow in 2026, that is apparently still considered leadership somehow. Now let's shift gears.

Confidentiality And Workplace Gossip

SPEAKER_00 55:48

It is now time for policy time. And remember, something became a policy because someone then messed the shit up for all of us. And today's policy is confidentiality and restricted covenants. Now the handbook says all team members are required to sign a confidentiality and restricted covenants agreement as conditions of employment. That translates into what happens at work does not automatically become content for your group chat. I know, revolutionary, right? Apparently, we need paperwork explaining that confidential information should remain confidential. Because some of y'all hear confidential and think, okay, but can I tell my sister? No. Well, she doesn't even work here. That's the point. We work around an incredible amount of private information, family information, employee information, financial information, children's, you know, medical information, business plans, enrollment, staffing information, um, disciplinary information, incident reports. You know, it goes on and on. And depending on your position, you may know things that absolutely do not belong in casual conversation. You might know that a family is behind on tuition, that and you know, that is not break room entertainment. You might know a teacher is receiving disciplinary action. That is not your opening story at happy hour. You might know why a child was absent. Again, not your business to distribute. Some people get one piece of confidential information and immediately become CNN. Breaking news from the toddler room. No, you are not a correspondent. Go clock back in. Rest of it says team members who improperly use or disclose trade secrets or confidential business or family information may face disciplinary action, termination, and even legal action if they do not personally even if they do not personally benefit from sharing. Somebody got caught sharing information and said, Well, I didn't get anything from it. Well, congratulations, neither did anybody else. You can create an absolute disaster, complete free of charge. The fact that you didn't receive $500 a gift card or a free chicken sandwich does not make the disclosure acceptable. Sometimes people gossip for compensation. Other people gossip because you know it's Tuesday. Both can get you fired. And now Brenda. Brenda has worked at Little Sunshine Academy for approximately six weeks, and Brenda has already decided that she is not simply an employee, she is an investigative journalist. Brenda knows everything, or at least she thinks she does. A parent walks into the office and quietly asks the director, Can I make a partial payment tuition this week? Um, we had an unexpected expense. Now Brenda just happens to be making copies nearby. Normal employee response? To keep copying. But Brenda's response? Oh. Now why are you saying, oh, nobody was talking to you? The director works privately with the family and moves on. But Brenda cannot move on. Brenda has received information, y'all. And information is Brenda's favorite recreational drug. Thirty minutes later, Brenda's in the break room. Now I'm not supposed to say anything. Stop. That sentence should trigger an automatic shutdown. Because whenever somebody says I'm not supposed to say anything, what comes next? The thing they're not supposed to say. So Brenda whispers, because of course she whispered, but apparently Jaden's parents can't afford tuition. Now Brenda does not exactly, you know, actually know that. The family asks about making one partial payment, but Brenda has already created an entire documentary. Next teacher walks in, Brenda says, Don't repeat this. Oh, absolutely. Because gossip becomes confidential when you say, you know, don't repeat this. This is apparently how cybersecurity works, y'all. By lunch, Brenda's version has evolved. Now the family is experiencing serious financial problems. By 2 p.m., Brenda has them losing their house. By 3 15, Brenda has doubt y'all then started a prayer circle and a nobody acts for prayer. This woman asks if she could split a payment. Now Brenda has gotten people praying over a foreclosure that does not even exist. But wait, oh no, we're not finished. Because Brenda also learned that another employee had been called into the director's office. Now Brenda doesn't know why, but not knowing has never stopped Brenda. So she posts in the staff group chat, anybody know what happened with Melissa? With the you know, with the watching eyes emoji. And that eyeball emoji is responsible for approximately 40% of workplace conflict. I just want to put that out there. So then Melissa responds, nothing. Brenda, okay, girl, because you know everybody was wondering. Everybody who? It was you, Brenda. You are everybody. Brenda creates a rumor that then cites the rumor as a source. Then comes the grand finale because we're not done with Brenda yet. A parent mentions privately that their child is being evaluated for developmental services. Brenda overhears part of the conversation, and during Brenda, during pickup, Brenda tells another parent, you know, I think they're getting Jaden evaluated for something. He getting tested for something. Ma'am, now we have crossed from workplace gossip into completely inappropriate disclosure of private family information. The director hears about it, Brenda gets called into the office, and Brenda is shocked, y'all. I I didn't mean anything by it. Excellent. Intent does not magically erase impact. But I was just talking. Yes, that's the problem. I didn't post it online. We are not grading confidentiality violations on a curve, Brenda. And then comes part two of rest of that policy. The handbook says all confidential information remains the exclusive property of the company. And when your employment ends, you have to return or erase confidential records in your possession. Which means you cannot quit Friday and leave the enrollment and leave with the enrollment spreadsheet. You cannot email the staff contact list to your personal email. You cannot download family information because I might need this someday. For what? Why are you building a personal archive of preschool records? Your employment ended, your access ended. Hand over the binder. Delete the file, return the keys, and Brenda, delete the screenshots because you know Brenda has screenshots. Brenda always has screenshots. Brenda has screenshots from 2024 that nobody remembered asking for. Confidentiality is ultimately about trust. Families trust programs with deeply personal information. Employees trust leadership with private employment matters. Organizations trust employees with business information. Once people believe their personal information is going to become workforce or workplace gossip, they stop communicating honestly. Parents stop telling you what's happening at home, employees stop going to leadership with concerns, teachers stop asking for help. Everybody is now guarded. And now your workplace has a trust problem because Brenda needs something interesting to talk about during lunch. Good leaders protect information. Good employees understand that access does not equal ownership. Just because you know something does not mean you have permission to distribute it. Something, you know, sometimes professionalism means hearing something and doing something revolutionary, keeping your mouth closed.

Funding News And Final Takeaways

SPEAKER_00 1:03:29

With that said, I want to mention a few ECE highlights from the past week. So civil rights groups have sued the Trump administration over efforts to restrict billions in federal child care and family assisting funding. The administration had already rescinded a freeze affecting five states after court challenges. Why do we care? Because federal funding is not abstract. Mess with the money, and eventually we are talking subsidies, enrollment, staffing, and centers trying to run a business on prayer and snack crackers. Next, the first five-year funds released a 2026 state facts stating that nationally, 65% of children aged 5 and younger have all available parents in the workforce, and in 34 states, federal dollars provide at least two-thirds of combined federal and state public childcare funding. I know that sounds like a lot, but why do we care about this? Is because childcare is workforce infrastructure. When ECE becomes unavailable or unaffordable, it is not just an education problem. Parents just can't work. And on July 23rd, more than a dozen business leaders held a bipartisan Capitol Hill roundtable focused on childcare and the U.S. economy. Why do we care? Because employers are increasingly realizing that ECE professionals have been screaming this for years. You cannot have a stable workforce when employees can't find stable childcare. Apparently, it becomes an economic issue once somebody brings in a spreadsheet, I guess. Well, that is all I have for you for this episode of Stumbling Through Work where policies are questionable, the meetings could have been emailed, and somehow Brenda is still employed. I'll talk to y'all later. Bye. This has been another episode of Stumbling Through Work where educators figure shit out. If this episode entertained, educated, or inspired you, go ahead and subscribe and share with others. I'm Dr. Jarek Huff. Catch you next time Stumbling, but still showing up.